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Couples


Our couples program helps identify patterns that may be getting in the way of a thriving relationship. The DBT informed skills extend couples the opportunity to learn, understand, and grow together.

Program Overview

Everyone experiences moments of emotional vulnerability and sensitivity and we can all benefit from becoming more skillful. This is especially true if one, or both, members of a couple are emotionally sensitive, as such relationships can be intensely delightful as well as challenging. 

Our couples program helps couples cope with intense emotional patterns that disrupt their relationship and get in the way of building a close, loving, and fulfilling partnership. This program is a DBT informed treatment that teaches DBT skills to help break out of negative emotional patterns that prompt criticism, self-blame, or defensiveness. 

The goal of our program is to help you communicate accurately, effectively, and with validation so that you can deepen the intimacy and trust that we desire in our most important relationship.

Program Details

This program can include couples therapy and/or participation in a couples skills group. 

Assessment (3 sessions)

Before starting our program you’ll have a 60-minute couples assessment session with one of our therapists so that we can better understand the issues that you’re experiencing and determine if DBT, and our center, are a good fit for you. During this session, we’ll discuss the prevalence of:

  • Impulsive behaviors

  • Difficulty regulating emotions

  • Interpersonal challenges 

Following your initial assessment session, each member of the couple will meet individually with their therapist to provide additional information and context on the relationship.

After these three sessions are complete, we’ll determine if private couples therapy and/or skills groups are appropriate.

Pre-Treatment (1-3 sessions)

If you’re planning to participate in a couples skills group, we recommend that you participate in 2-3 couples sessions in advance of joining the group. In these sessions, your therapist will prepare you for the skills group and develop the necessary rapport to support you individually, if needed, during the skills course. We also ask that couples read The High Conflict Couple: A DBT Guide to Finding Peace, Intimacy and Validation by Alan Fruzzetti, PhD which this program is based on.

Treatment (12  individual sessions / 12 group sessions)

Couples Therapy (weekly)

If you’ll be working with an individual therapist, you'll begin meeting with your therapist on a weekly schedule. The duration of our work together will depend on the specifics of your situation. The majority of sessions will be dedicated to couples therapy, however, some clients benefit from periodic sessions with each member of the couple. 

Skills Group (weekly)

Once the assessment process is complete and a basic foundation has been laid during couples therapy, you can begin attending a skills group. This is a small psychoeducational learning group that meets for 90 to 120 minutes (depending on whether a break is needed) weekly. Groups typically include 3 to five couples. The skills group continues for approximately 3 months and is led by a therapist and an associate. Sessions combine lecture, discussion, role-playing, and practice exercises.

This skills group includes the following weekly sessions:

  1. Understanding Emotion Dysregulation

  2.  Mindfulness in Relationship

  3. Interrupting Ineffective Behavior Patterns 

  4.  Being Together with More Aliveness 

  5. Reactivating Your Relationship

  6. Accurate Expression 

  7. Validation: Whats and Why 

  8. Validation: How Skills  

  9. Recovering from Invalidation 

  10. Managing Problems and Solutions

  11. From Conflict to Closeness 

  12. Summary, Review, and Celebration

 
 
We mostly did the group after a few individual sessions and found the course enormously helpful. And I have the book by my bedside when I need a refresher.
— Graduate parent

 

Required Reading